So that post last night was quite depressing. I'm going to make a sincere effort to be more positive about this new year. it's hard though...especially when you aren't where you want to be in your life.
i always swore i would have no regrets. and now all of a sudden i am finding that i have a ton. things that i am feeling like i regret now, that i didn't regret 2 years ago. funny how that works.

i'm having lunch today with my friend...the one i slept with on Christmas eve. so far, it hasn't been weird between us. We've carried on like we always do...but we have shared some extra giggles and smiles...you know the ones...where you share a look that says "i saw you naked...=)"

I going to post later about our lunch.

Also...last night i went out for a walk around the city. and guess who i saw? Him. i haven't seen him since october, when all the shit went down. he looked real good. especially with the woman on his arm. they were laughing...and they looked very comfortable together. the kind if comfort two people share when they have known eachother for awhile. so i guess my instinct was right!
he saw me. he looked as if he was about to say something, but i just gave him a wink, and walked off. i did not want an uncomfortable scene. he texted me later that evening...just a simple text that said "thank-you Alexandra."

Well, until later...Happy New Years Eve!

2008

This is the first New Years Eve in a while that I have no interest in participating in.
And why?
Because I do not have a special someone to share it with.
The thought of the ball dropping at midnight, and me standing there alone with no one to kiss scares me. It signifies another year of getting older, and no family of my own in sight.
I plan on spending the night alone, and going to sleep early. I do not wish to be around happy people buzzing off champagne with the hope of the new year to come in their glazed over eyes. I don't want the left over smooches and hugs. I want my own.

I should have went away. Someplace tropical. someplace to ring in 2008 around people who do not know me, who wouldn't ask questions, who would just have a good time.

I wish you all a happy and safe night though.
Cheers!

I'm Still Here

It's been forever and a day since I've jumped on here...but don't worry, I'm back.
I guess I just needed a little hiatus to get myself together again.
I've been extrememly single since my last post, and I am loving every freakin second of it. It's what I needed. I traveled, I caught up with friends and family that I had neglected over the year, and I geared up for the holidays. And....I've been on some dates. I'm feeling stonger every day, and I've been real good about having little to no contact with Him.

I had sex again too...happened Christmas Eve...how romantic is that? lol
An old friend of mine and I were at my place frantically wrapping Christmas gifts. We had some yummy red wine, had Christmas music on in the background, and we were talking about old times, laughing, etc...it was like a scene right out of a movie. I was feeling warm and fuzzy, and leaned in for a kiss...and he kissed me back! Next thing I know, we are in my bed...and it wasn't one of those hungry rip your clothes off and get it sessions...it was slow and sensual...and it was great!

I'm just hoping that doesn't make our friendship weird now though. I've known him since highschool, and we've never once crossed that line.
I always hear that once you sleep with a friend, it's downhill from there. Is that true?

Well I hope I still have some readers out there, and I hope you all had a wonderful holiday!!
xxoo